maccuham hat geschrieben:
Ich find das sooo gut das muss ich Helen uebersetzen!!!! 
Aber was dann wenn ich gar keine Kuh habe????
und ein Terrorist bin?
dann glaube ich fest daran das es bald den heiligen Krieg der Kuehe gibt..schnall mit ne Bombe um..
und in meinem Himmel dann hab ich tausende huebscher Kuehe bei denen ich jederzeit frei meine Milch kriege!
Aber was dann wenn ich gar keine Kuh habe????
und ein Terrorist bin?dann glaube ich fest daran das es bald den heiligen Krieg der Kuehe gibt..schnall mit ne Bombe um..
und in meinem Himmel dann hab ich tausende huebscher Kuehe bei denen ich jederzeit frei meine Milch kriege!
for Helen:
Livestock in different political systems!
Socialism
You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. The government takes one and gives it to you from your neighbors. You will be forced to form a cooperative to help your neighbors in animal husbandry.
Communism
You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. The government seizes both cows and sells you the milk. You stand for hours for the milk. It is acidic.
Liberalism
You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?
Social democracy
You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty because you are working successfully! You choose people in the government that tax your cows. This forces you to sell a cow to pay the taxes can. The people that you have chosen to take this money, buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous you. Udo Lindenberg sings for you.
Christian Democracy
You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You keep one and schenkst your poor neighbors the other. Then you regret it.
Representative Democracy
You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone tells you who gets the milk.
National Socialism
You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you off you.
EU bureaucracy
You have two cows. The EU takes you from both, kills one milks the other, pays you compensation from the sale of milk, and then pours it into the North Sea.
Traditional capitalism
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull for this. The herd grows, the cows retire and live off investment income.
Bank-controlled capitalism
You have no cows. The bank will lend you money to buy cows, because you can not offer cows as collateral.
Anarchy
You have two cows. Both run away.
Capitalism à la Enron
You have two cows. Three of them you sell to your public company, using letters of credit that has your brother in law at the bank, then you're making a "dept / equity swap", in conjunction with a "general offer" so that you back get all four cows, with a tax rebate for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a company in the Cayman Islands, the secret part of that majority shareholder who sold back the rights to all seven cows to your publicly listed company. The annual report says that your company eight cows belong with the option of another. Now Sell one cow and buy a new American president, what do you now owns nine cows. A balance sheet will not be published.
American capitalism
You have two cows. You sell one and leases them back. What you are a corporation. You force the two cows to give four times the milk. You wonder, as a drop dead. You give out a press statement in which you explain, you would have your costs lowered by 50%. Your shares rise.
Japanese capitalism
You have two cows. You designst it new. Now they are ten times smaller and give more milk than twenty times an ordinary cow. Now you're creating a clever cow cartoon, calling him "Kuhkimon" and vermarktest him around the world.
German capitalism
You have two cows. Using modern genetic engineering, the animals are bred so that they are all blond, drink a lot of beer, give milk of the highest quality and 160 km / h run. Unfortunately, the cows require 13 weeks holiday a year.
French capitalism
You have two cows. Are you striking because you want to have three cows. You go lunch. Life is beautiful.
Italian capitalism
You have two cows, but you do not know where they are. That's why you melkst the EU. You see a beautiful woman. You're making lunch. Life is beautiful.
Russian capitalism
You have two cows. You count them and get to five cows. You count again and come to 42 cows. You count again and come on 12 cows. You stop counting and doing with a new bottle of vodka on. The Mafia comes along and takes you - how many cows there may always be - both from.
Swiss capitalism
You have more than 5,000 cows, of which you heard but not only. You take care of the animals and collect money for other money for accommodation. When the cows give milk, you tell it to anyone.
British capitalism
You have two cows. Both are mad.
Austrian capitalism
Each cow has a title, there are committees, subcommittees and committees formed and obtained expert opinions. The result is provisional, but remains forever. The milk is distributed by the social partners. Each bull has a privilege.
Chinese capitalism
You have two cows. 300 people are there to milk them. You explain that there is full employment, high productivity rate and verhaftest the journalists who published the statistics.